The Tallahassee Crab Trap

2,693,712 views

Consider this the advanced users only section of the Internet. And nothing spells T-A-C-T-I-C-A-L A-D-V-A-N-T-A-G-E quite like a woman that could literally use a Volkswagen Golf as a dildo. If you're not into safe spaces being invaded... this one isn't for you.

Uploaded 11/05/19 Loose

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Denny's Waiter Tipped With Blowjob

He says it's the best tip he's ever received but considering he's going to get fired for a 3 second blowjob... I'm not convinced. Also, never trust a girl who values her blowjobs less than what she tips.

4,217,621 views 02/29/16 Voyeur

Oscar-Worthy Anal

We're gonna need that statue back, Leo.

1,787,988 views 11/13/17 Gay

The Truth Behind Girls Gone Wild

[what you know]: Anyone that's had a TV on after 1:00AM between the years 1997 and 2003 are still trying to get this fucking theme song out of their heads. [what you don't know]: Doug "hobgoblin" Stanhope had the approachability of post-nut clarity Clint Howard. I demand a reboot.

1,810,363 views 05/04/21 Documentary

Cum Haters 2021

Semen sociopaths play their Blue-Eyed White Self-Harm cards in attack mode. The end result? A 4 minute tutorial of what not to do when you finally get the leading role of an independent movie. 10/10 reactions tho, would fap again.

1,653,066 views 08/23/21 Premium Bukkake Cum Haters

BEEFUS MAXIMUS

See the thumbnail? Get used to making that face. For you're about to meet a woman with enough human-grade roast beef to end global hunger. I never finished medical school... but it's my professional suggestion she uses the $47.00 paid for this scene to buy a pair of hedge sheers on the way home.

2,365,325 views 05/08/19 Loose

THEY JUST WATCHED?

46,972 views 04/15/24

Your ASS is Gonna Learn Today

free tip: Don't be fooled by the "i collect exotic toothpastes and I'm saving my g-spot for Sonic the Hedgehog" appearance. She may appear to be innocent, but this is no sex noob. Despite leaking more soft serve than a birthday party at Carvel, she actually did finish the scene.

2,263,890 views 03/31/22 Woodman Casting X Loose

Most Ridiculous Orgasms Fucking Ever

I have a totally epic attraction like lol. only fuck you once under. Don't I ever include not a fucking internet return entry. so really serious like you know i love like you, only u r so easy living free.

3,245,326 views 05/10/17 Orgasms

Permission to Destroy

Lexi Grey has a long list of do's and a virtually non-existent list of do-nots. Now somebody get this future hall of famer the urban dictionary definition of Alabama Hot Pocket ASAP so we can fight over who gets to marry her first.

1,740,487 views 02/21/22 Hoby Buchanon Loose

The 49 Year Old Virgin

Meet Allen. At almost 50 years old, he's never had sex and is on the verge of losing all hope. Now it's up to a $400 goth hooker with a heart of gold to help him lose his virginity once and for all... or will he fuck it all up?

2,694,410 views 11/13/14 Documentary

The Girlfriend Experience

And by experience, I mean one man blowing up his beer money on the kind of sexual endeavor that would shell shock a Vietnam war veteran. Speaking of blowing up: The only thing missing from that slaughter house between her legs is someone in the background screaming wUrLstAr and Floyd Mayweather coming out of retirement to fight it.

2,078,184 views 11/18/20 Horror Porn Loose

OOPZ, LOST TEH DILDO

Losing an 8 inch dildo in in a girls ass can have some consequences beyond fecal flavoring. If you can't get it out, the shoot is over and it's an awkward trip to the hospital with an unhappy porn star.

3,598,035 views 02/04/14 21Sextury Fail